i’d love to say i’ve been through this before you’re bringing out the best in me and i promised myself but somehow i never let anyone so near that i’m my worst self today my scarred, broken skin shows and i turn into a joke oh if you’d only seen me yesterday because it hurt so much when i was careless, strong and free i promised i would heal i felt like i was seventeen and began again but most of all wiser i felt awake stronger oh had you seen me yesterday you were my little secret i danced in the fitting room i didn’t dare to tell the world how lucky i was how grateful i were if you’d seen the minidress i bought for you how i owed you if only i had told you i was borrowing you lovely glow and claiming it as mine would we be talking now? and now you won’t answer is it because we disagreed, last week? you won’t call me back i know i’m making it worse but all this being awake it’s already bad becomes too much and i don’t care i regret it so if i said something wrong and my head spins, please let me take it back and i feel cold and sick because i will hurt and i can’t think i’m begging you one painful truth please tell me this won’t let me be i know i can pull myself together and go on, but it hurts is this my fault, again? and am i driving you off? do i really have to?
.don’t free me. don’t lure me. don’t miss me. . you know this heavy cord you know your words please . around my feet they’re sticky if i loved you even more . it hurts to soar it hurts to hear their truth i might give up . but i’m afraid but i’m afraid but i’m afraid . i might drift off i might believe it hurts to miss . if i let it go if i listened to you and mydear . please pleaseyou know i couldn’t make you . don’t free me. don’t lure me.miss me.
an air of purity had surrounded her, when she first noticed me. i was sitting across the fire, and through the flames, i looked over to her, from time to time
wondering where she came from
wondering how many people were in love with her.
and then she noticed. i was embarrassed to stare at her, but her rather tragic face lit up when she smiled, and i couldn’t turn away. she reminded me of sophy gray, who once sat for millais, as a young girl.
oh god, she was hautingly beautiful. Continue reading →